Wednesday, June 18, 2008
This is never a simple task.. to break the news to my grandma.. Yes...
I was going thru so much.. before telling her about this...
Jojo and Win is here for dinner last night.. and to visit my grandparents...
So it's impossible to tell her at that time...
After dinner.. i headed for my shower.. which follow by my grandma n my mum n so on...
After my shower.. talked to dear for a while... he is doing his reservist currently.. So he was pretty tired..
We were on the phone for a while... but gues probably he is too tired.. or he simply neglected it..
He was talking on and on about his army stuffs.. which he never even ask if i'm ok or how am i this few days since we did not talk for the past 2-3 days... It was only after that then he asked if anything happen this few days? Haiz...
I told him that i'm going to tell my grandma after i talk to him... which he did ask about how am i going to say it out... Seriously i tell him i dunno.. coz its not a plan or to tackle her or wat...
I just wanna share with her.. thou i wont know how she will take it.. but i wanted to share with her..
He was saying that jie guessed correctly.. i'm soft hearted.. so he guess that i will not tell my grandma at all till the end.. coz im scared to hurt them in any way... Well.. but i did say tat i'm going to tell her...
Well.. I went over to my grandma's room after that.. then she went out to watch tv...
So i was out too.. thou i was sitting there.. but not really watching tv lo...
wait till the show finish and she wanted to go to bed.. i went disturbing.. lying on her bed next to her.. haha.. So.. i was telling her about the whole story of moving out...
The reason behind... all the incidents that happened after i moved out...
Well.. she did not totally disagree.. in certain extend she agrees the reason for me to move out...
However, as a mother, she is worried about my dad.. which is why she dun really agree on the other hand..
We were talking since about 130am... The whole conversation ended at about 5am...
Her reaction was normal.. Not too big of a reaction... She just simply asked the reason...
Trying to talk to me and convince me to move back.. due to my dad... tat's all...
However.. i stayed firm.. call me stubborn if u want... i refused to move back as yet...
I dun wanna move back simply due to her attitude change this few days when my grandparents around..
This is not real.. It's simply an act.. Put up in front of my grandparents..
Well.. i just hate that fake act.. my grandma can't out talk me..
So she agreed to me that we shall see how thing goes.. and if my mum did change..
i will slowly.. gradually go back more often and maybe slowly move back...
That is the conclusion for the night.. but of coz tat is temporary only..
We will see how thing goes... basically im too scared of the same old thing will happen again...
Today afternoon, my mum called.. So fake...
Ask me wat time i can make it for dinner... and asked if i told my grandma abt it..
I told her yes.. and she just say tat she is going to show the letter to my grandma...
Wtf... i hate it... dun act in front of me... just do watever u want... u already forced me to say all the things and admit all the wrong.. wat else u want...
End up now.. my grandparents is telling me that after they read the letter...
They did scold my mum.. they said tat she cried while they talk to her...
She promised my grandparents.. she will take care of me...
She will keep her temper.. won't anyhow throw out her temper..
So now... my grandparents are asking me to move back... if possible.. end of this month or wat..
Haiz.. dilemma... frankly i dun wanna move back... but my grandma is like this... her heart ache this morning... she have to take her medicine this morning... it's the first time that her heart ache this year...
The previous time was last year... Haiz.. i dun wanna her to suffer like this....
My heart also pain when i hear it.. teach me wat to do pls.... gosh...
Pray hard hard for me.. Make the choice for me god... I'm tired... I'm mentally tired... God bless....
YoLaNdA Left This At 4:17 PM
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